a day of reality

today was just one of those days where u know its not going to be a good onee , one of those days where u realize why somethings u wanted to do for a reason, u realize success doesn't always mean happiness . . . at least in my case. my mom is so money hungry is driving me insane, i hate to say it but she is one of the most inconsiderate, munipulative, conniving, cynical person i have ever met && i know that's really awful to say that about someone who brought u into this world but i didn't ask her to && i know that's probaly a really selfish thing to say .. times like this i wish i had one of my parents because u know, i`m a daddy`s girl && my father`s out of my life now && he chose to be he wasn't forced to or given an altimatum, just one day he never came back && I've learned to cope with that ... well almost. && my ex is just horrible to the point i wish i didn't love him ... instead of being there for me && asking me what's wrong he assumed i`m unhappy over DICK ! can u believe that, huh . but I've been there for him for the whole 3 years I've known him whether it was listening to him rant about his father or giving him money but instead he calls me names && says i`m acting as if I have no life clearly not knowing the situation at all && misjudging me in the worst possible way. today is just one of those days where I realize that my mom is greedy && my ex doesn't understand me, i lost my bestfriend months ago && i might be incapable of caring && showing compassion for a man but that's karma, I've been screwing everyone all my life taking their love for granted && i probaly won't change, idk .